Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Refusing to agree continues

I was going to vent on here today, but I’m striving to be a good person, so I will take the pill I was just given and choke it down as best as I can . I just got word from my son’s mother that she had been in to see her lawyer today and signed some papers. She was trying to circumvent needless stress on my part, since I have a lot of studying to do for an exam tomorrow evening, by giving me a heads-up.

I think that she thought of this, because of an under-handed move she made early in our separation, and maybe was trying to avoid a repeat. Back last summer she had her lawyer contact me with some of the worst words I have heard throughout this whole process, in essentially diminishing my rights to my son to six days a month, the day after I had driven her and my son to the airport to fly away on vacation. The day after she had made me promise that we would go on family vacations together. That was the letter that forced me to take legal action to ensure my rights and my son’s were looked after in regards to access.

Anyway, back to today. I thanked her (we were using email during this conversation), and told her that if it was anything bad then let me know and I would avoid my lawyer’s calls or emails until the end of the week. Then my desk phone rings. My heart sinks; obviously I am not going to like the words I am about to hear.

She tells me that she had just signed off on some paperwork that my lawyer had been working on, and they sent back a revision. She then told me what the revision was. It is in regards to our son. It was a section I had added whereby she would agree that we would each have to ask the other to take our son, if we couldn’t be with him, before finding someone to babysit him. It’s essentially right of first refusal.

I am not going to go into my thought process right now or how it makes me feel. It’s probably fairly obvious how hurt I am from this topic appearing on my blog. All I am going to say is that I know I am a good father. I have learned lessons from those in my life and I strive every day to be a better Dad to my son. The circumstances are not ideal, but I do the best I can and first right of refusal should be default, not something written on a piece of paper witnessed by lawyers.

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