Monday, March 1, 2010

All for him

Just when I think we have reached a place of calm, something triggers my ex wife to try and exert unreasonable control over my life to a degree that is unfair and leaves me in disbelief.  For anyone who knew my dad would know that he was not one to avoid conflict and to a large extent I am the same way. 

I will defend myself and give it as good as I take it.  But there has been a big change in my instinct to react when my seperation became one of a legal nature.  I learned to bite my tongue.  It's a hard thing to do and since Friday I have been biting my tongue so hard that I can taste blood.  I want to lash out and tell the world the games that are being played, but alas my focus is on my actions in our divorce to be ones I will not be ashamed of.  I will be able to hold my head high at the end of all of this.  And all for him.  I don't ever want him to learn of my actions and be disappointed in me. 

I have fought hard for the shared custody I have.  I am still fighting for the right of first refusal.  But I am fair and above board.  I have tried to negeotiate fair terms with my ex, instead of pulling in lawyers everytime. 

I do it all for him. 


Jody said...

Its sad that more people don't feel this way. The even sadder thing is, when they do act badly, I don't think they believe they are. I don't think for one minute Andy's ex thinks she was ever out of order.

Keep on doing what you are doing Jeff. William will thank you for it. x

JBrown31 said...

I agree, I don't think she probably thinks she is doing anything wrong, because she doesn't want to let herself see things from my side. And I don't believe those who are supporting her, especially her lawyer, are being objective either.

Thanks for your encouragement Jody, this week I need it.

Jody said...

Its Friday tomorrow and hopefully things are a bit brighter :) I'm always here for you, no matter what.

BTW, I meant to mention how much I love this photo of Will. x

Kari Anne said...

Hi...I found you through Daddy Scratches... I just want you to know that I know what you are going through...divorce is SO HARD! I have a 9 year old daughter, and though our divorce was civil and we fought about nothing, it was still hard on her... She was 6 at the time of our divorce and 5 when we separated. To this day, when she is missing "us", she will come crawl in my bed and snuggle up to me and she will cry for a little while and then she's better.

I think that it is AWESOME that you are fighting for the shared custody of your precious son. We didn't go that route...we have joint custody and he gets her every Wednesday from 6-8pm and every 1st, 3rd, and 5th weekend...but it never works out that way...he normally only gets her once a month... We meet for dinner during the weeks that he doesn't get her like he should (he's a cop and has had weird hours and odd days off), but I think that it's all about to change. He's now in a position that he works 8-5 (most days) M-F and is off every hopefully, he will be able to get her more often...for her sake and his... I know they miss each other like crazy!

I wish the best of luck to you!